Random thoughts on packout

We're still here in NY, organizing and piling and packing and cleaning up messes. We kind of slowed down the pace after the packout was canceled. My husband took another load down to DC today. I will drive down tomorrow to take over care of the kids, who are with my parents (thank you, thank you!). We move into Oakwood on Saturday afternoon. Can't wait to get settled!

Some random thoughts about packout:

• Do we have too many clothes? None of us is a clothes horse (is that the expression?), but we each have like 3-4 bags of clothes. We cannot travel abroad with this much. So of course, in a global sense, we have too many clothes. There are people around the world who have nothing but the shirts on their backs. I am really good about purging, but I do keep clothes that I don't love, but wear once in a while. That stuff has to go. And we'll see about the rest of it. 
• Do we have too many toys? Yes, of course. This fact has been established. :) We're going to be very popular at Oakwood, I think, but we are going to be selective about how much of the toy store we take abroad. 
• People have said this is the hardest packout, because we don't know how long we'll be in DC and where we're going afterwards. This can't possibly be true for us, perhaps because we live close enough to DC and have a house in which to store stuff for a while. When we move abroad, we really have to decide what are the essentials, and either travel with or send those things in our UAB. Right now, we are basically bringing everything we want. If we can't fit it now, we'll come back later and get it. We can bring 10 bags of clothes, including an entire suitcase full of suits. We can bring half-full bottles of olive oil and shampoo and even the frozen chicken in the freezer. That won't work when we leave for post (I hear departing FSOs have parties to give this stuff away). And then you have to worry about your suitcases making it and your UAB arriving. And of course, your choices about what to bring all depend on the country you're going to. Whew, I'm tired just thinking about it. 

Ok, back to work. Time to tackle the kitchen.

Lesson #1: Be flexible

So..we've had a little change in plans. There was this tiny snowstorm up and down the East Coast...some called it a blizzard...and now the front of the house looks like this:

And the street looks like this:

And it's going to be a bit difficult for a moving truck to park.

So we're on to Plan B. We postponed the packout and we're going to drive down later this week with lots of stuff (since my husband already took a load down on Saturday, we should be able to carry all the essentials). Then, we'll decide if we want to reschedule soon and have the UAB sent to us, or just load it into the car. We don't have that much for UAB, at this point. 

This all means that D will handle the HHE/storage packout alone, since I can't take any time off during A-100. I'm a little worried about this aspect of Plan B, but what can I do? So we might end up with our beach umbrellas in Vladivostok, but we'll roll with it.

We got a lot of snow. After being cooped up for days, little M was happy to get outside. He played for at least 30 minutes before the wind and cold got to him. L lasted only a few minutes.

You can tell it was a windy storm, as normally our covered porch stays snow-free...

I do love our house and street in the snow. They are so pretty.

A good lesson in FS flexibility.

Taking a break

Merry Christmas to everyone celebrating today. 

We've been busy around here. Yesterday, D's aunt and uncle came to play with the kids while we worked some more. As always, it was wonderful to see them and we appreciated their help so much (and apparently Auntie L reads my blog, so Hi!!).

It was fun to see Uncle P, who is an architect, get into building with M.

I didn't get any shots of Auntie L, but did get one of little L enjoying the new tutu they brought her.

As for progress, I've emptied out the kids room, packed half of my clothes, and organized the office/mud room. I took things out of UAB and put others in. I found my daughter playing in the UAB once again.

After much debate, we decided D should take some stuff down to MD today to store for a week at my parents' home. We were worried about fitting anything else in the minivan after the toddler bed and crib were loaded. In fact, we were able to fit lots more, including our work clothes, files, some toys, non-perishable food, crockpot, etc. I am going to miss my Sienna.

Here are some pics taken before my husband set out. He's going to drive ~9 hours roundtrip today. Thank you honey! The good news is that there should be no traffic at all.

The kids were delighted to find their carseats inside. They wanted to be strapped in, and it was quite tempting to leave them there all day while I got to work. But unfortunately, they didn't like that idea.

Ok, that's enough from me. The kids are asleep and I've more packing to do. Ciao!

T-5 days

Yesterday was my last day of work. It was chaotic, kind, and quick. I worked there for 4 years- that's the longest I've ever been at a job, so even though I was glad to go, I did shed a tear or two upon leaving.

Next up?
Preparing for packout. YEA.

Kids are at daycare. I ran some errands and now I'm alone with my mess of an office. Still a little too early to pack clothes or the kitchen. So the office it is. Wish me luck. 

Making piles

We took the house off the market this week and thus I finally got to start making piles. My wonderful aunts came over to play with the kids so that D and I could focus. The kids were in seventh heaven! Two people playing with them for 4 straight hours? Poor kids- we've been a bit busy lately and have not sat down to really play with them. We are very grateful to the Aunties A!

It really felt good to finally start organizing our stuff. I've been thinking about this for so long. We realized a few things: 1) we have a lot of stuff and especially a lot of toys, and 2) it probably won't fit into 3 cars and UAB (unaccompanied air baggage- State gives us 700lbs of stuff that will be delivered to our VA apartment), since we are taking the crib and the toddler bed too (plus our desk files that we did not get a chance to purge). So it looks like my husband will make a trip down to DC to store some stuff in my parents' home for a week. Thank goodness for them. But part of me is bothered- why do we have so much? I suppose other families coming from far away have to make the decision either to send the extra toys/books that won't fit into UAB to storage or get rid of them. I've given away so many toys and books. I've decided to keep the stuff that is age appropriate, even if they don't play with it much, but I'm starting to rethink that policy. And I will certainly do a major purge before we leave for post.

Anyway, here's a pic of L playing in the UAB pile. Here's an example of stuff: I've let go of dozens of stuffed animals they don't play with. L has a series of about 10 that she adores, and then there are some others they love, but don't play with daily. I put a hamper full of those in the UAB pile, and of course she found it. I'm not taking hundreds of stuffed animals to Mumbai or Pretoria. But for now, I'm going to let them have their stuff, I guess.

(a note about the pumpkin for our non-FS family/friends: we don't know how long we'll be in DC. We could be there up to a year without access to our storage stuff, so we have to bring everything we'll need. I'm bringing the Hanukkah box, too...even though we just celebrated it. We'll hopefully need our beach/pool toys, beach umbrella, and summer clothes- we hope to stay in DC long enough to enjoy the pool at Oakwood!- but we decided to leave those here in NY for a few more months. We'll come up and get them when needed.)

Relief

You probably heard a huge sigh of relief coming from New Rochelle last night.

My husband received word that his company is going to transfer him to DC in January.

He'll be with us for A-100. I won't be a single mom. The kids won't have to deal with missing daddy on top of everything else. My best friend will be with me.

This boss knows about the FS and understands that D might be there for 3 mos or 12 mos. They won't invest anything in training D since he already knows the ropes. So even though we will still favor an assignment that keeps us in DC a while, we won't be desperate for one.

And most importantly, I don't have to figure out how to organize another layer of stuff that has to be left at the house for Daddy to use, on top of the UAB, HHE, car items, etc. Well, ok, it's not the most important aspect of this news. But it might be close.

I am truly so thankful.

This is as creative as I get

I've been wanting to share this with you for a while. I made M's moving book about a month ago, and he proudly brought it to daycare and showed it off. But I had some changes in mind to make L's even better. And suddenly, we're only a few weeks away from moving! So I got it done today, finally.

I wish these pictures were more clear, and I'm sure if I was more technologically savvy, I'd figure out a better way, but this is what I have for now.

I'm looking forward to doing this all over again very soon!

I'd be happy to share the text (I'll leave off the photos which made the file ginormous) with anyone who would like it. Just leave me a comment with your email and I can delete after sending.

Still excited!

Yesterday was a great day. I took the day off to be there for the pre-packout survey. I had to laugh when she asked me if we were going to pare down the items in the bookcase. Um, yea, we already did? I also got totally overwhelmed as we walked around the house - closets that I cleaned out 2 mos ago have gotten cluttered again! What do I do with all the toiletries and such? (Answer- pack a box of in-use toiletries and take them with us in the car). What about the cupboard full of oils and vinegars and other liquidy items? Also hoping to take them in the car.

We are lucky that we will have 3 cars heading to DC- we have two and my parents are bringing a truck (ok, mom?). So we will carry more than most people on our way down, and I am grateful for that.

But let's just say that I might be assuming more room than there will really be. I will pack this stuff a few days to a day in advance and try to fit it in the cars, so at least we'll know.

We also STILL have stuff we need to sell and donate. What a pain! I wish this was all done. I went to the consignment shop yesterday and dropped off some things, gave others to our daycare, dropped our new kids world map at the framers, etc. (I think I bought this world map , which you can't see very well and it's a little cheesy in person so I don't really recommend it. But I like the idea- we spent a while looking at the different animals all over the world. We also got the book Children Around the World from the library and it's become my son's favorite book recently).

A note to those on the register: Seriously, declutter now! I would be losing my mind right now if I had not been preparing for months in advance. 

I had lunch at my favorite spot, Stanz in Larchmont. I will really miss that place!

I am still really loving the uncertainty of it all. Where will we go? I have no idea!!

Counting down

3 weeks from tomorrow, we pack out.
4 weeks from today, I start my new job.

We still don't know whether my husband is moving to DC with us. He is waiting to hear about a few job options. Cross fingers for us.

My husband is starting to get stressed.

My son is starting to act out. He alternates between great behavior and absolutely abysmal, freak-out behavior. He's having potty issues again. It's hard to know how to handle it, but I'm just trying to give him a lot of love (which is hard when he's misbehaving and needs a time out, but is clinging to me crying, "Mama!"). It's going to be a fun (3? 6? who knows?) months until he feels more secure.

The other day I was explaining the assignment process to my boss and she remarked that she was impressed with my ability to handle this uncertainty. Actually, I'm impressed too, as flexibility and dealing well with the unknown have never been strengths of mine (it's actually one reason I wanted to join the FS- to get better at handling change).

I'm sure I'll get stressed soon enough, but for now I'm energized and excited. I'm just taking it a week at a time. We'll make each decision as it comes. We'll figure out what to do with the house when we have to. We'll see what's on the bid list and create our bidding strategy accordingly. One week at a time.

A perfect day

We had a such a lovely day yesterday. First, we met D's aunt and uncle at the newly renovated Stepping Stones Children's Museum, which is completely gorgeous. Of course, I had to feel a little sad that it's been updated just as we're leaving, but we did enjoy this museum quite a bit over the years here. We then went to The Brewhouse for lunch, a place we've visited multiple times and have always found it to be delicious and very child-friendly. D's cousin and his girlfriend joined us, the kids played with their new toys (thanks Aunt L and Uncle P!) and we were able to linger and talk after lunch was over. D and I are very thankful that we both have family living in the NY area. We've enjoyed their presence at birthdays and other times over the years and they will all be missed.

We got home around 3pm and were expecting friends for a Hanukkah dinner around 5pm. Normally, I would start to totally stress out at this moment. But we had spent a frantic hour before leaving cleaning up the house in preparation for a showing. And I had prepared the chicken entree I planned to serve too, so it sat marinating and waiting just to be popped into the oven.

I am not a very accomplished cook, so we don't do a lot of entertaining. Every time we do, we have a great time and wonder why we don't do it more often. But it's always a LOT of work that makes me feel overwhelmed. This time, the Chicken Marabella was ready and would cook for an hour, leaving me with time to greet my guests. I also planned to make wild rice which takes an hour to cook. So the only things I had left to do were to prepare the green beans and set the table (In case you're wondering about the Hanukkah part of the meal, we bought latkes at Fairway and they were the best latkes of my life!).

Here's a picture of the table. I love how colorful it looks. Chaotic, but definitely colorful. It's funny; I got this tablecloth in Niger 13 years ago, and haven't used it much recently. It felt like that traveling part of my life was over. But happily, it's not!

 Here's a pic of me and my dear girlfriend S. I will miss you!

 After dinner, we cleared off the table and made Hanukkah cookies! This is a tradition that's very dear to me.

Our friends have two sons. Here's 5yo T with my M

Here's their cute 3yo, L

Hey, at least I look good, right?

The big guys were really cute, too.

 Here's how the night ended. The guys were talking about communism and who knows what else while drinking Scotch next to the fire. It made me sad because in the 3.5 years here, we've never used that little nook in that way. For the first 3 years we lived here, we kept it covered and out of reach so little hands would not harass the fire doors and little heads would not crack on the concrete floor. And also, the seats are quite uncomfortable. But isn't it adorable?

It was truly a perfect day. Thanks family and friends!

Kickin' it into high gear

Our Thanksgiving was awesome. We drove down on Thursday am and hit not a lick of traffic. Yes! We spent 3 days with my family, eating, shopping, playing with Moses the big doggie, and fighting over which movie to watch. Thanksgiving is definitely my favorite holiday. My only regret is that I didn't eat enough of my mom's world famous pecan pie. But I bet if I ask her to, she'll make me one in January when we move there.

It was very strange thinking that next time we are at my parent's house, we'll only drive 20 minutes to get home. Or that our trip back to NYC will likely be our last. It felt so good to arrive home on Saturday night, but that made me sad, knowing that soon it won't be our home anymore. I'm doing ok with it, really. But that did give me a twinge of sadness.

So we have a month to get ready for packout. Not stressing or worrying yet. But aware that it's time to get busy.

I was very productive last Wednesday when I was home alone.

• finalized and sent my State new hire forms
• prepared and sent my Mexico wedding photos to be scanned at ScanMyPhotos . I will leave one CD in storage and take one with me. I will probably make a Shutterfly photo book so that people can actually LOOK at the photos without my stressing about ruining my perfect, handmade, one of a kind album.
• prepared my home inventory and started discussing with my husband

I hope to share my thoughts on property insurance and inventories at some point, but for now, I just want to list some tasks for the next 2 weeks:

• get ready for Hanukkah which starts Wed!
• start clearing out various drawers/closets which have gotten messy again (or were never cleaned)
• order more file storage boxes and continue to empty my old photo albums
• finalize holiday shopping- people will be getting their gifts early this year!
• hopefully get our holiday cards ordered, if I can manage this task this year

That is probably enough, since most nights I can barely stay awake long enough to tuck my kids into bed. :)

Hope you all had a wonderful holiday, too.

Thankful

So many things to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.

There's this guy, my best friend. I love this picture because he looks so relaxed. We were on Caye Caulker, an island in Belize, visiting my brother Jake and having the most relaxing time. I am thankful that soon he will be able to say goodbye to the job that does NOT make him look like this, and forge his own path. And I am thankful that he is taking this amazing leap of faith with me, though we know not where it will lead.

And then of course, there are these small people, my pride and joy. I am so grateful to have two healthy, smart, endearing, beautiful, kind children to light up my life.

And then there are also, oh, I don't know....

• my parents, in-laws, siblings, and extended family, whose love and support is unquestionable and unmatchable;
• my amazing network of friends, new and old, near and far, in person and through cyberspace;
• the fact that we both have jobs, allowing us to have a roof over our heads, food to eat, and money to buy the things that we need;
• our good health, which is never something I take for granted; 
• and this year, the incredible chance to join the Department of State and serve my country in interesting places around the world.

There is much to be thankful for this year, indeed.

Fall photos

Some pictures from our recent adventures near home. My little brother Jake came to visit after returning from Peace Corps Belize. He brought his big doggie Moses.

And today Daddy spent the morning raking leaves in preparation for our first appointment to show the house. The kids decided to help.

Uncle Jake reading to his niece. Aw.

Doggie Beach in Larchmont- it's awesome!

Moses came home with Jake from Belize. He's not sure about the cold. Isn't he pretty?

Autumn fun

It really doesn't get much better than this.

Another Flag Day!

I kept thinking about the 157th A-100 class yesterday- it was their Flag Day! So far, I know about assignments to Tashkent, Monterrey, Kathmandu, Bridgetown, Nuevo Laredo, Kampala, Bratislava, Shenyang,  and that's it. Looking forward to hearing from a few more bloggers and cyber friends.

I can't believe that the next Flag Day I'll be eagerly anticipating will be mine.

To do this week

Nothing too earth-shattering to report over here. Random thoughts running through my head include:

It's so depressing to go down to the basement! It looks SO nice just with a freakin coat of paint on the floor (oh, and all the stuff cleared out)! I could have been doing laundry in this nice bright space (hey, it's all relative, folks) for years!

The rest of the house looks really nice, too. We have been keeping it clean and organized and while it seems to get "crapped up" (as we like to say in the B household) in a minute, the cleanup doesn't take as long as it used to.

It's time to get back on the ball with all my tasks, such as:
1) calling insurance companies re transit insurance
2) finishing the kids' moving books
3) scheduling my pre-move survey (received my orders, which was exciting!)
4) booking a hotel for a few days during/after packout
5) finishing those ridiculous State pre-hire forms
6) figuring out health insurance
7) requesting charts from MDs
8) continuing my house inventory (argh...)
9) setting up help with the kids during our packout, which of course coincides with the daycare being closed (no way around that one...)
10) selling all those lingering items on Craig's list or begging someone to take them on freecycle

So yea, I guess I have some things to do.

Feeling better

I think it may be a little secret of the Foreign Service that many people have some ambivalence or fear after getting/accepting the offer. My concerns are mostly kid-related, but everyone has issues they worry about. Not that I want others to feel what I've been feeling, but this knowledge that I am not alone has helped me move to the other side of the apprehension (for now, anyway).

I am excited again. I can't WAIT to see that bid list. I am looking forward to the next month passing quickly so we can get this show on the road, literally.

The hard work of preparing our house for market is almost behind us- whew. Now we just have to maintain the beautiful uncluttered environment. It feels so good to see the house like this that it's not hard to find the time to keep it that way. Our sweet little house is just waiting for her new owners to come along, hopefully very soon!

And now we get to enjoy some playtime. For the next few weekends, we are scheduling lots of time with friends & family since it's better to be out of the house. My little brother is home from Peace Corps Belize and coming to see us this weekend with his big Belizean hounddog, Moses. Can't wait!

I am so touched by all the thoughtful comments from many of you- thank you!

Thoughts this week

Two days ago, I drafted a blog post sharing how stressed, scared, and sad I've been feeling lately (only S feelings allowed) about everything that's going on. But I just wasn't ready to publish it yet. And it turns out that the act of writing about it was once again a salve, as it always has been in my life. I am feeling much more serene (there's an S again...), despite the fact that today I not only wrangled the kids to daycare alone on time, but also did so while leaving the house in (mostly) immaculate condition for the realtor to take photos of it!! Ta da! I will accept the Superwoman award now.

It's been hard for me to write lately, as I struggle with how much to share. I think of the different audiences that read this blog, and it's hard to know how honest to be. The candidates who would give a lot to be in my shoes, the family members who are wondering what we are thinking, the friends who are rooting us on...for each group I would write a bit differently.

But I'm the daughter of two shrinks, and I think of the blogs I read that were painfully honest and helped me realistically weigh this life, so I'm opting for sharing my feelings right now.

I'm sad about leaving New Rochelle and our cute little street. Which is ironic and somewhat frustrating, because I also remember writing here about how miserable I was at the thought of staying in New Rochelle and our 'boring NY life' indefinitely. And I realize that I am purposefully entering a lifestyle in which I'm going to do this to myself and my children over and over again. I've been working to reframe this feeling and just be grateful for the time that I spent here. I'm trying to accept that the sadness means that I lived somewhere special that I loved. There are other beautiful places in the world waiting for me to call them home, but I can't do that until I leave New Rochelle.

I've been sad about seeing our house all fixed up and looking prettier. We did our best, but never found the time/energy/money to really make it look nice. I will especially miss our backyard and patio. I couldn't have asked for a better outdoor space, and I feel like we didn't use it enough. But I know at least some of my future homes will have wonderful outdoor spaces, too.

I'm scared and sad about what my children are about to experience in the next few months. 4yo M is so sweet and vulnerable. He is gobbling up news about our move, but I know in his head, he's moving from one "home" to another. Whereas the reality is that this next home might be just for a month. Or 3 mos. Or 12. I mean, who on earth knows? While I understand the rationale behind not telling him too much, especially when I don't really have information to share, I also don't want him to be blindsided when we ship out to Kolkata, for example. I've mentioned that we don't know how long we'll live in VA and it might be for a short time, and he tells me he wants to stay in VA for a long time. Thoughts on handling information sharing at this age would be helpful indeed.

There are definitely other stressors, but those are the ones I can share right now. I am trying to take it just one day at a time. And I am very grateful to be starting this journey, despite the scariness of it all.

NYC meetup

Last night I had dinner with 3 of my January A-100 classmates. We are all so different- lawyer, media professional, teacher, and health care administrator. Different ages and life stages, definitely. Fellow blogger Career Diplomat is about to buy a house in Florida (perfect for home leave rentals!). S. is about to get married and hasn't had much time to think about A-100 prep. N. is teaching in a Long Island school and working on the forms. I'm the only parent in this group. But we had a terrific time. I am really going to enjoy getting to know my A-100 classmates. Everyone has such fascinating experiences to share and an interest in the world.

But meeting up with them also made it more real. We were talking about Istanbul, and suddenly, I just had to duck my head and take a few deep breaths for a minute. It's one thing to be doing this by myself. But when I think about taking my kids around the world, every once in a while, I freak out. I wish I could describe what I feel, but I can't seem to put it into words. I just want to snatch them up tight and hold them. I can only imagine what I'm going to be feeling on Flag Day or departure day.

Of course, I had to get a picture for the blog! Forgot my camera, but luckily CD's phone saved the day.

Career Diplomat, N, Bfiles, S

4th and last Halloween (sniff, sniff)

I'm a little late, but wanted to document our fourth and last Halloween in our little house in New Rochelle. I am grateful that my mom was able to continue her tradition of joining us for Halloween, which allowed us to go trick or treating as a family and generally have fun with Grammy and her fabulous costumes.

Our neighborhood wasn't quite as mobbed as Halloweens past, as it turned quite cold over the weekend. But we still distributed nearly 7 Costco bags of candy. Yes, 7 bags!!  It's insane.

And now, of course, some pictures of the B family. This year, L was having nothing to do with her costume, until I bribed her with not only a glowstick, but also some M&Ms. Did I mention she is 2 years old? She had no clue what was going on, but soon realized people were giving her candy and she decided to cooperate.

And here is our annual Halloween family picture. We've been really lucky to get a cute one for 3 years in a row. Or maybe tenacious is more like it. My mom does not give up!

Here's last year's shot!

And 2008! My, how we've grown!

We have no 2007 because 1) mom wasn't here and 2) little M fell trying to check out the trick or treaters and cut his forehead, so we spent the evening in the ER. 

This concludes my show and tell!
Hope you all had a great Halloween!